What We Did On Our Day Out - by Terri, Age 48

I toddled off down to the river yesterday with half the Fraud Department.

In the morning, we took to canoes in teams of 2 and rode rapids and weirs. All of us were soaked and half of us were covered in mud, to boot.




I ended up being one of those covered in river mud, having stepped off the canoe into some very deep sand when we tried to come ashore at last.

After a braaied lunch, we were taken further up the road and deposited onto quad bikes, which we rode through some very hairy terrain indeed.

On a break, we climbed up inside the little mountain into a cave and came out on top. The cave was dark and holy, the way these things are, but the quads were profane and noisy, and I was sorry to be pissing off the environment that way.

Speaking of Life, the wildlife started with a mangy, thin Pitbull named 'Dog' on the river rafting farm. Dog loves everyone. Except, presumably, the people he ran away from. Now he won't leave the idyllic confines of the farm, and who can blame him?

On the river, we were circled by an eagle (Ave Aquila!), stalked by a legavaan, and peered at sullenly by a human seated on the banks. A monkey was also watching us apparently, but I was so concentrated on not fighting the water that I didn't see him.

On the quad trail we passed a lone warthog and entire herds of cattle, mixed Brahman and Hereford, who weren't inclined in any way to get off the trail. Good for them. The grass had burnt badly in a recent fire, and that had chased away much of the free roaming bokke. Vervain was growing by the cave mouth, though, and loosestrife of all things seemed quite comfortable in front of the camp toilets.Hecate would have been happy to see the masses and masses of Datura all along the banks - enough I dare say to poison a dozen corporate Fraud Departments.


Eventually,dirty, wet and very tired, we all made it home in Time for Tea.

I'm assuming. At least, I did.